I’m amazed at how fast two years can go by and how much happens during that time! We have had 31 birthdays for immediate family members, celebrations of New Year’s Eve to Christmas, and every holiday in between, two family members passed away, provide assistance to my wife’s 93 year old mom, the return of children coming home with their children due to financial pressures, the exodus of children with their children, our moving to a smaller home and the challenge of downsizing the things that we’ve accumulated over the years, and so much more!

The “so much more” includes some health issues that I have dealt with for several years, namely, a back problem. After taking some time off of work to focus on treatment, recovery and strengthening, my back pain was for the most part gone–and that was huge! But no sooner did my back pain leave, that every joint in my body began to hurt so badly that I needed my wife’s help to get out of bed, getting out of a chair, and sometimes rolling out of bed and crawling to the bathroom if my wife wasn’t at home.

Some days were better than others. We were on a string of good days so my wife and I planned to take the hour drive south with three of our granddaughters to visit the San Diego Wild Animal Park. It was a beautiful day but by the time we reached our destination, I was not feeling well. Fortunately the Park has stroller and wheel chair rentals, unfortunately I didn’t fit in the stroller because I just wanted to lay down! Of all the days, up and downs, these past two years, that zoo day was bitter-sweet. I got to spend a beautiful day with my family, but was humbled by pain and being wheeled around by one of my granddaughters or my wife.

Praise God they love me and my wife is SO good natured with me. One of the many reasons I love my wife is that she has an amazing sense of humor and she is so gifted at making lemonade when life gives us lemons.

So the latter are just some of the reasons I haven’t contributed to my blog for the past two years. Oh, and I haven’t mention that I was emotionally burnt out too! Not only did I not feel like writing, but I also needed to break up with my church. I had served until I hit the wall emotionally as well as physically. That’s not my church’s fault necessarily, but it isn’t story for another day.

Although I’m not whole yet, I do want to write. I love it. It’s fun. It’s freeing. But writing also takes a focus that hasn’t returned fully yet. Much of my focus has to be on making a living and loving my wife and family. I don’t know how often I can contribute to this blog, and it’s certainly far less than I had intended, but I will return when God leads me and gives me the strength and the voice to share.

By the way, after almost a year, after baffling several doctors, blood test after blood test not pointing in one disease direction or another, after a myriad of medicines tried and failed, the joint pain just stopped. “WHAT WAS ALL THAT FOR?!?,” I asked myself and God that questions many times. Although I am not sure I why I have experienced pain in my life, I am sure that God is in control and that He loves me.

“Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For He Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” So we may boldly say: “The LORD is my helper; I will not fear. What can man do to me?”
‭‭Hebrews‬ ‭13:5-6‬ ‭

“Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them; for the LORD your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you.”
‭‭Deuteronomy‬ ‭31:6‬ ‭

God created me for a purpose, and part of that purpose includes pain, and the empathy I have gained for others dealing with all types of pain. I don’t always know exactly what to do when someone else is in pain, but the first thing I do is pray for them. Counseling, consoling, or commiserating with someone in pain isn’t always what is desired when they experience it. And each case is different. Many times I didn’t know what I needed or what others could do to help me. I just wanted peace.

“Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing psalms. Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer of faith will save the sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.”
‭‭James‬ ‭5:13-16‬

In the long run, I know that I’m a very blessed man. So many others deal with far tougher circumstances than me. A little over a year ago, a friend lost his 29 year old daughter. Instead of letting grief lead to isolation, my friend and his family celebrated the way Julia celebrated life. When things got tough for Julia she danced.
In Julia’s memory, the family and her friends created a website, www.IKeepDancing.com. The website is dedicated to inspiring hope and joy in the midst of adversity, and to provide resources, support and opportunities for those who continue to dance in the face of grief and hardship.

“A time to weep,
And a time to laugh;
A time to mourn,
And a time to dance;”
‭‭Ecclesiastes‬ ‭3:4‬

The group’s hope is that Julia’s mantra — “I Keep Dancing” — will penetrate our heart, and encourage us to keep dancing through our own struggles — to emerge stronger. And when life just feels impossible, and we reach that breaking point, their hope is that we feel Julia in our heart, turn on your favorite song, jam out, and dance!

If you need support or would like to support IKeepDancing.com, please visit the site — you’ll be blessed!

Until next time, peace and joy!